musings on a wednesday

When you feel your heart’s guarded
When you see the break has started
When the clouds have all departed
You’ll be right here with me

~ Brandy

I randomly decided to do a bunch of "research" on Brandy the other night-- this may or may not have been inspired by the fact that the R&H remake of Cinderella was on TV-- and decided to download one of her more recent songs. Gosh darn if I don't really enjoy it. Then I watched Dancing with the Stars with my pal Angela the other night and saw Brandy dressed in a schoolgirl outfit dancing the jive. Life, you're weird.

I'm doing pretty well with the whole Life Goals thing. Last night, I went to the gym and worked out. My iPod died 20 minutes in, which sucked since I far prefer listening to music to watching TV whilst I sweat, but I caught the beginning of Melissa and Joey, and obviously all was well. I spent the rest of the evening cooking a relatively healthful dinner of pasta and veggies and watching TV. And thus far, I've managed not to buy anything frivolous. I am however buying lunch at the cafeteria today rather than eating my leftovers, because come on-- it's chicken quesadilla day! If I can't have Panchero's, you best let me have my quesadilla at the cafeteria.

It hasn't all been sunshine and roses, unfortunately. On Monday, my old classmate Joe from middle/high school was killed in a accident. He apparently ran the second stop sign on Anson/18th Ave in M-town and his truck was hit by a cement truck.

I hate to say the words "it doesn't really surprise me" but the truth is, it's not completely shocking. This may have been an honest mistake, but Joe was always a little reckless. It's funny; I often think about the time in high school, before play rehearsal started and he, Jessica E, and I hopped in his truck and went out to Morrison to his house to get something... we were on gravel roads and he was going so fast, I felt a little reckless myself.

And actually, I felt a little special that we were hanging out. He was like a bad boy I was a little intimidated by and a little snobbish about and having his attention like that was exciting. Even if his gravel-driving skills were a little too edgy and good for a 16 or 17 year old.

But Joe was amazing with cars, even back then. He got an AA degree in mechanics and had gone back to get his BA in something mechanics/car-related as well. I remember him always being out in the shop when I had a study hall out there in the ag building. I was always in awe of those guys who knew how to do anything out there.

I have a lot of funny memories of Joe. He and Nicole B "dated" back in middle school, and they were joined at the hip. I remember questioning Nicole a lot about what they talked about-- the idea of having a boyfriend back then was so foreign and mysterious to me.

Joe was a bit of a hoodlum, to be honest, but he wasn't stupid. He was smart, and friendly, and quick. Although, he did have a bit of that boyish brand of stupidity in him-- he and Chase used to chase each other with BB guns, shooting at each other like complete morons.

Boys.

Another memory that makes me shake my head with laughter and amused disapproval is the time he and Cole rode Joe's bike out to Deidra's house. We were all hanging out at Deidra's for a sleepover-- must have been eighth grade-- jumping on her trampoline and watching movies. Cole had just had his infamous and defining episode: shooting half his foot off with his dad's shotgun. He was still in his cast, riding around on the back of Joe's bicycle, which was one of those little stunt bikes, and they rode that damn bike all the way out to Deidra's house just outside the Brook. Miles. Joe was already exhausted and naturally Cole's foot hurt like hell, and they still had to bike all the way home again.

But they wanted to hang out with some girls, so they did it anyway.

So long, Joe. You always seemed like a pretty decent guy.


~